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some thoughts on life

November 14th, 2009 (12:13 am)

i am someone,
i walked past a dead face,
even though the person was alive.

i saw my eyes in the mirror,
and cried at the sight...
i looked at a person i didn't know.

i met a friend,
and got heads to turn...
when i walked past.
i learned a lot about myself,
when i lost a new friend..
i cried every tear in my body.

when i thought about love...
i got hit bad...
then got back in the ring.
i climbed a mountain of rocks,
then saw an eagle fly overhead.

i heard terrible things about myself...
when no one thought i was listening.
i realized i was strong,
when i didn't cry when it hurt.

i found out who i was,
when i was with someone else.
i thought i was lost forever,
when a friend found me.

i held a life in my hand,
and it was my own.
i was a pawn in someone else's game
so i surrendered to a brook.

i walked the fine line between surviving;
and not wanting to survive..
i still am..
i am someone.

(no subject)

April 7th, 2009 (04:46 pm)

Today you ask me how my day was
As if it's so normal
I said I'm okay
But you really don't know how i feel

Do you think I'll be okay without you?
Are you okay without me?
The world without you is so hard
I blame myself for still breathing


What do I do?
Even now, I live each day painfully because of your words
Tell me if this is a bad thing to do
Are you living each day painfully like I am?
Tell me...

You and me,
is it too late?
Do we not have a chance?
I still think about you
And you probably don't even know


Ultimately, is this it? Are we going to end like this?
Is it okay with you? I don't think I can do it.
The love I have with you, I won't have it anywhere even if I die


What do I do?
My heart can't embrace anyone but you
Please, hold me.
And you know that even though the whole world tries to
No one can erase your memories. So please hold me


What do I do?
Even now, I live each day painfully because of your words
Tell me if this is a bad thing to do
Are you living each day painfully like I am?
Tell me...


You and me,
is it too late?
Do we not have a chance?
But me... I still think about you
And you probably don't even know

(no subject)

April 7th, 2009 (03:55 pm)

그댄 너무 당연한듯
오늘 내게 안부를 묻네요

난 그저 잘지낸다했죠
그댄 정말 날 너무 모르죠

그대 없이도 내가 괜찮을 것 같나요
그대는 나 없이 괜찮나요

당신없는 세상이 너무도 힘들어서
숨쉬는 날을 원망했죠

어떡하죠 아직도 난
그대 한마디에 부셔지는
하루를 살아요
그대 내게 말해봐요

이러는게 나뿐인지
그대도 나처럼 하루가 아프고 또 아픈지
말해봐요

그대와 난 이미 너무 늦었나요 우린
다시 기회는없나요

아직 그대 생각해요
그댄 아마 알지도 모르죠

결국 이런건가요 이렇게 끝인가요
What Do I Do lyrics on
http://music.yeucahat.com/song/Movie-Game-Ads/52014-What-Do-I-Do~JiSun.html

그대는 이대로 괜찮나요

난 안될 것 같은데
그대같은 사랑을 죽어도 내겐 없을텐데

어떡하죠 내마음은
그대 아니면 누구도 안아줄수 없을텐데
제발 나를 잡아줘요
알잖아요 나란 사람 아무리 애써도
그대를 지울수가 없단걸
제발 나를 잡아줘요

어떡하죠 아직도 난
그대 한마디에 부서지는 하루를 살아요
그대 내게 말해봐요

이러는게 나뿐인지
그대도 나처럼 하루가 아픈고 또 아픈지
말해봐요

그대와 난 이미 너무 늦었나요
우리 다시 기회는 없나요

아직 그대를 생각해요
그댄 아마 알지도 모르죠


You and me, are we already too late?
Do we not have another chance?
Still, I think of you
You probably don’t even know.


(no subject)

March 31st, 2009 (09:37 pm)

I lied just a little
When I said I need you
You stretched the truth
When you said that you knew
Just cant believe it
Theres nothing to say
I was almost honest, almost
Living alone, cant stand this place
Its four in the morning and I still see your face

I was nearly pure
When I said I loved you
You were semi-sincere
You said Id bleed for you
We were kind of candid
Now youve gone away
You were almost honest, almost

Living alone, falling from grace
I want to be alone but theres just empty space
I cant face tomorow, now youre not coming back
Walked off in the night and just left me the tracks

I question your call by the tone of your voice
I know I should hang up but I dont have a choice
It happend that night when you told me to go
Dont ask whos to blame, I dont know

Almost, almost honest
Almost, I was almost honest

i did it again.

March 31st, 2009 (08:52 pm)
confused

current mood: confused

i'm watching the past replay all over again.
i'm back here at the very same point, now aware of my actions.
aware of how i'm pushing my love away. yet again, i'm doing so.
aware of how much pain he's going to be put through.
i've learnt from the past, but i've become cold and indifferent.
watching as he breaks apart into a million shards,
i feel nothing. nothing. nothing at all.

why do i push my love away, you ask.
do i really deserve to be loved? can i really be loved? can i really love again?
i don't even trust myself, how can i trust my actions..
if i push him away now, it'll still be alright to mitigate the pain already inflicted.
and stop it from turning into the last breath.

i really don't know what i should do now.
i've to make a decision that i'd rather avoid.

Every time I see you falling
I get down on my knees and pray
I'm waiting for the final moment
You say the words that I can't say

I feel fine and I feel good
I feel like I never should
Whenever I get this way
I just don't know what to say
Why can't we be ourselves like we were yesterday

I'm not sure what this could mean
I don't think you're what you seem
I do admit to myself
That if I hurt someone else
Then I'll never see just what we're meant to be

So in the meantime
You'll be resting on my mind
For the last time
I will leave myself behind
In the evening
Raise a glass and tell some lies

I got your message
But I didn't hear the ringing bell
I gave into the loneliness
But I didn't give up nothing else

My reflection
In the window when I ride
Could not save us
But I swear to God I tried

Take a picture
Write a letter to my love

I was almost honest
But I was almost honest
Cause I was almost honest

As life goes on I'm starting to learn more and more about responsibility
And I realize that everything I do is affecting the people around me
So I want to take this time out to apologize for things that
I've done things that haven't occurred yet
and things that they don't want to take responsibility for

I'm sorry for the times that I left you home
I was on the road and you were alone
I'm sorry for the times that I had to go
I'm sorry for the fact that I did not know

That you were sitting home just wishing we
Could go back to when it was just you and me
I'm sorry for the times I would neglect
I'm sorry for the times I disrespect

I'm sorry for the wrong things that I've done
I'm sorry for the fact that I'm not aware
That you can't sleep at night when I am not there

Because I'm in the streets like everyday
I'm sorry for the things that I did not say
Like how you are the best thing in my world
And how I'm so proud to call you my boy

I understand that there's some problems
And I'm not too blind to know
All the pain you kept inside you
Even though you might not show

If I can't apologize for being wrong
Then it's just a shame on me
I'll be the reason for your pain
And you can put the blame on me

(no subject)

March 26th, 2009 (01:08 am)

꽃보다 남자 - 김연우
Kochboda namja- kim jeon woo

좀더 멋진 남자보다 다른 그 무엇보다
Jomtu musjin namjabota tarun ku mungusbota
좋은 남자가 되고싶어 너를 위해
Johngun namjaka toegosipo no rul wi hae
아무리 힘들어도 울지않고 겁먹지도 않는 너는
Amuri himtorodo uljianhgo kobmonjido anhnun noneun
부러울것 하나없는 내게 단 하나의 꿈인거야
Buroulko hanaobsnun naege tan hanaui kkuminkoya


**오~~ 난 너만 있으면 돼 나를 봐
Oh~~ nan nu man issumyon duae narul bwa
이젠 다른 누군 보지마
ijen narun nu gun bojima
가끔 내가 싫기도 하고 아직 미덥지도 않겠지만
Gakum naegi silhgido hago ajin midob jido anhgess jiman
나도 날 알아가는 중인걸
Nado nal araganeun jung in jeol
조금 기다려 줄수 있니? 너를 사랑하는 한 사람
Jogum ginarjeo julsu issni? Neoreul saranghareul han saram
너의 단하나의 남자로
Neoui danhanaui namjaro


별로 예쁘지도 않고 여자답진 않아도
Bjeolro jepeun jido anhgo jeojadabjin anhado
네 안의 맑은 특별함은 내겐 보여
Ne anui malguin tuigbjolhamuin njae gen bo yeo
처음엔 알아보지 못했었어
Chuuimen alaboji moshaessusseo
니가 나의 사랑인걸
Nuga naui sarangingul
내 마음을 눈 뜨게 한 세상 단 하나의 꽃이란걸
Nae mauimuil nun tuige han sesang dan ha naui kochirangul

**오~~ 난 너만 있으면 돼 나를 봐
Oh~nan numan isseomyon duae narul bwa
이젠 다른 누군 보지마
ijen narun nu gun bojima
가끔 내가 싫기도 하고 아직 미덥지도 않겠지만
Gakum naegi silhgido hago ajin midob jido anhgess jiman
나도 날 알아가는 중인걸
Nado nal araganeun jung in jeol
조금 기다려 줄수 있니? 너를 사랑하는 한 사람
Jogum ginarjeo julsu inni? Neoreul saranghareul han saram
너의 단하나의 남자로
Neoui danhanaui namjaro


아무리 강한 너라도 지쳐버릴때 있겠지
Amuri ganghan nurado ji chyeobu rul tae issgessji
그럴땐 내게로 와서 내품안에서 울어줄래
Gui reol tae nero waseo naepum anhe seo ureojul rae

**오~~ 난 너만 있으면 돼 나를 봐
Oh~nan numan isseomyon duae narul bwa
이젠 다른 누군 보지마
ijen narun nu gun bojima
가끔 내가 싫기도 하고 아직 미덥지도 않겠지만
Gakum naegi silhgido hago ajin midob jido anhgess jiman
나도 날 알아가는 중인걸
Nado nal araganeun jung in jeol
조금 기다려 줄수 있니? 너를 사랑하는 한 사람
Jogum ginarjeo julsu inni? Neoreul saranghareul han saram
너의 단하나의 남자로
Neoui danhanaui namjaro
너의 단하나의 남자로
Neoui danhanaui namjaro

think you know me?

March 13th, 2009 (12:27 am)

Your view on yourself:

You are down-to-earth and people like you because you are so straightforward. You are an efficient problem solver because you will listen to both sides of an argument before making a decision that usually appeals to both parties.w

You are intelligent, honest and sweet. You are friendly to everybody and don't like conflict. Because you're so cheerful and fun people are naturally attracted to you and like to talk to you.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:

You are a true romantic. When you are in love, you will do anything and everything to keep your love true.

You like serious, smart and determined people. You don't judge a book by its cover, so good-looking people aren't necessarily your style. This makes you an attractive person in many people's eyes.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:

You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.

You prefer to get to know a person very well before deciding whether you will commit to the relationship.

The seriousness of your love:

Your have very sensible tactics when approaching the opposite sex. In many ways people find your straightforwardness attractive, so you will find yourself with plenty of dates.

Your views on education

Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.

The right job for you:

You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.

How do you view success:

You are afraid of failure and scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed. Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous.

What are you most afraid of:

You are afraid of having no one to rely on in times of trouble. You don't ever want to be unable to take care of yourself. Independence is important to you.

You are concerned about your image and the way others see you. This means that you try very hard to be accepted by other people. It's time for you to believe in who you are, not what you wear.

Who is your true self:

You are full of energy and confidence. You are unpredictable, with moods changing as quickly as an ocean. You might occasionally be calm and still, but never for long.

You are mature, reasonable, honest and give good advice. People ask for your comments on all sorts of different issues. Sometimes you might find yourself in a dilemma when trapped with a problem, which your heart rather than your head needs to solve.

(took the quiz twice, with some varying results. compiled it and posted.)

(no subject)

February 25th, 2009 (02:07 am)

총맞은 것처럼
정신이 너무 없어
I’m out of my head, like I was just shot.
웃음만 나와서
그냥 웃었어 그냥 웃었어
그냥
All I could do was laugh, so I just laughed.
허탈하게 웃으며
하나만 묻자 했어
“Let me ask you one thing,” I said, as I laughed halfheartedly
우리 왜헤어져
Why are we breaking up?
어떻게 헤어져
How can we break up?
어떻게 헤어져 어떻게
How can we break up? How?

구멍 난 가슴에
우리 추억이 흘러 넘쳐
Our memories flow out of the hole in my heart
잡아보려 해도
I try to catch them
가슴을 막아도
I try to plug up my heart
손가락 사이로 빠져나가
But they slip through my fingers
심장이 멈춰도
Even if my heart were to stop
이렇게
아플 거 같진 않아
I don’t think it’d hurt as much as it does now
어떻게 좀 해줘
Please do something
날 좀 치료해줘
Please treat me
이러다 내 가슴 다 망가져
For if this continues, my heart will be destroyed
구멍 난 가슴이
My hole-ridden heart

어느새 눈물이
나도 모르게 흘러
Tears begin to fall
이러기 싫은데
I hate being like this
정말 싫은데
정말 싫은데 정말
I really, really hate it

일어서는 널 따라
무작정 쫓아갔어
I stood up and began following you aimlessly
도망치듯 걷는
너의 뒤에서 너의 뒤에서
소리쳤어
And I cried out behind you, as you rushed away

구멍 난 가슴에
우리
추억이 흘러 넘쳐
잡아보려 해도
가슴을 막아도
손가락 사이로 빠져나가
심장이 멈춰도 이렇게
아플 거 같진 않아
어떻게 좀 해줘
날 좀 치료해줘
이러다 내 가슴 다 망가져

총맞은 것처럼 정말
가슴이 너무 아파 어~
My heart hurts so much, like I was just shot
이렇게 아픈데 이렇게 아픈데
살 수가 있다는 게 이상해
It’s strange that I can go on living when it hurts this bad
어떻게 너를 잊어 내가
How can I forget you?
그런 거 나는 몰라 몰라
I don’t know how
가슴이 뻥 뚫려
채울 수 없어서
There’s a hole in my heart and I can’t fill it
죽을 만큼 아프기만 해
It hurts so much I could die
총맞은 것처럼 우후~~
Like I was just shot

(no subject)

February 8th, 2009 (01:12 am)

처음 그대로 - 정재욱

너무나 사랑했지만 여기서 돌아설게
끝까지 널 지켜줄 수 난 없기에
나의 모든 기억들 지워주길 바래
날 알기 전에 그때로 돌아가줘
 

이건 아닌데 이러면 안되는데
널 사랑할 수는 없는 거잖아
처음부터 모든 게 잘못되었었기에
더 이상 사랑할 수 없어
 

난 모르겠어 내가 왜 이러는지
내겐 남은 시간조차 없는데
내가 사는 이 곳은 숨쉬는 것조차
나를 가만두질 않아
 

나를 사랑하지마 내게 다가오지마
이별이 나를 기다리잖아
 

표현하지 않았어 너를 사랑했지만
내가 없는 빈 자릴 만들기 싫었어
나처럼 힘들까봐 더 아파할까봐
이런 널 만들기 싫어서
 

너무나 사랑했지만 여기서 돌아설게
끝까지 널 지켜줄 수 난 없기에
나의 모든 기억들 지워주길 바래
날 알기 전에 그때로 돌아가줘
 

사랑이란 건 사치일 뿐이라고
이렇게 믿으며 살아왔는데
다시는 그 누구도 사랑할 수 없다고
이렇게 살아왔는데
 

나를 사랑하지마 내게 다가오지마
이별이 나를 기다리잖아
 

표현하지 않았어 너를 사랑했지만
내가 없는 빈 자릴 만들기 싫었어
나처럼 힘들까봐 더 아파할까봐
이런 널 만들기 싫어서
 

너무나 사랑했지만 여기서 돌아설게
끝까지 널 지켜줄 수 난 없기에
나의 모든 기억들 지워주길 바래
날 알기 전에 그때로 돌아가줘

(no subject)

February 8th, 2009 (12:54 am)
sad

current mood: sad

어느새 길어진 그림자를 따라서
땅거미진 어둠 속을 그대와 걷고 있네요
 

손을 마주 잡고 그 언제까지라도
함께 있는 것만으로 눈물이 나는걸요
 

바람이 차가워지는 만큼 겨울은 가까워 오네요
조금씩 이 거리 그 위로
그대를 보내야했던 계절이 오네요
 

지금 올해의 첫 눈꽃을 바라보며 함께 있는 이순간을
내 모든 걸 당신께 주고 싶어
이런 가슴을 그댄 아나요
 

약하기만한 내가 아닌가요 이렇게 그댈 사랑하는데
그저 내 맘이 이럴 뿐인거죠
 

혹시 그대 있는 곳 어딘지 알았다면
겨울밤 별이 돼 그대를 비췄을텐데
 

웃던 날도 눈물에 젖었던 슬픈 밤에도
언제나 그 언제나 곁에 있을께요
 

지금 올해의 첫 눈꽃을 바라보며 함께 있는 이 순간에
내 모든 걸 당신께 주고 싶어
이런 가슴에 그댈 안아요
 

울지 말아요 나를 바라봐요 그저 그대의 곁에서
함께있고 싶은 맘 뿐이라고 다신 그댈 놓지 않을테요
 

끝없이 내리며 우릴 감싸온 거리 가득한 눈꽃 속에서
그대와 내 가슴에 조금씩 작은 추억을 그리네요
 

영원히 내곁에 그대 있어요

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